Planning for Thanksgiving in 2020
*This post is highly nuanced and reflects my personal opinion as of November 23, 2020. As my husband can attest, I may change my mind at any time.*
Overall, I feel like I’ve handled the pandemic pretty well. I’m introverted by nature, so the increased alone time has done wonders for my energy reserves. The weather has been gorgeous in the mid-Atlantic and getting out in nature has also been beyond restorative. I’ve gained clarity in my career. I’ve been more connected to family through our weekly Zoom calls. Life overall is good.
But lately, I’ve been experiencing similar levels of anxiety and sense of impending doom as I did back in the Spring when everything was unknown and scary.
I’m sure it has to do with rising positivity rates and anticipating another peak of cases at my hospital, coupled with not fully processing the first peak. And of course, being told that I would be killing patients by having social interactions didn’t help either.
Bottom line: I really don’t want to go through a surge again.
I have been craving connection, togetherness, ritual, normalcy. It’s a deep need within me. And I really want to have Thanksgiving.
I am also afraid of catching the virus myself and spreading it to others. More than anything, I don’t want to be the one to bring the ship down.
My head a blur, I spent a few days last week going through my stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, and depression. It seemed certain that I was going to ruin Thanksgiving either for my family or for the hospital.
I struggle to find the right approach or balance. Mass infection is real. Mental and emotional health needs are real too. All of it impacts health.
When I look to outside sources for guidance, I see a lot of scare tactics and shaming/blaming strategies. “People aren’t thinking with their heads.” “They’re a lot of dumb people out there.” “Your being selfish is putting lives at risk.” “The death toll is now up to [whatever huge number].”
I am wary of these strategies for promoting public health. They can work in the short term, at best, but I am not comfortable with them as long term solutions. They hamper creative/discerning thought and over time, can lead to rebellion.
To cleanse myself of these scare tactics, I spent a few days with classical music, no news, and couch snuggles with the dog. Finally, I was calm enough to think clearly and creatively.
I returned to these tenets:
- When 2 of 3 of the following are met, transmission is very unlikely:
- Wear a mask
- Go outdoors
- Stay 6 feet apart
- What we are experiencing in 2020 is really a pandemic of chronic disease, exacerbated by COVID-19.
- Dr. Zach Bush talks eloquently about this concept in several podcasts. I first heard him on The Kate and Mike Show and my mind was blown. He then did a Part 2 – mind blown again. I still don’t know that I agree with everything he says, but it was such a refreshing take on what we’ve experienced this year.
- He also explains why, like clockwork, this time of year is the beginning of virus season.
- Healthy people don’t die from COVID-19. (FYI, I have a much stricter definition of “healthy” than the general public.)
- Dr. Ben Lynch explains this concept further in this video
- Note, I do NOT agree with his conclusions about mask wearing, because we can’t know the true health of the people we are around.
- Dr. Ben Lynch explains this concept further in this video
- It is a better use of my time and energy to improve my health and the health of the people I care about than it is to fight a virus. “Host resilience” is the fancy term for this concept.
- This is a large focus of my Health Coaching service where we work towards your vision of vibrant health.
With all of this in mind, my family and I were able to come up with a Thanksgiving plan that allows us to be together, minimizes our risk of transmission, and supports our overall health… mostly :-).
While my anxiety is not gone, it is significantly lower than it was a few days ago. I have set connection and joy as my core desired feelings for this week and they feel inviting and attainable. I will continue to manage my thoughts and my exposure to news outlets to make them a reality.
How do you want this week to feel for you?
What can you do to get there?
A few parting tips:
- Hydrate
- Aim for half your body weight in ounces of water per day. Add a lemon slice for an added hydration boost.
- Herbal teas
- Salad greens
- Adding salad greens (esp. baby romaine, frisee, radicchio, or other baby lettuces) to lunch and dinner can do wonders for offsetting the heavy Thanksgiving foods.
- Open the windows
- Indoor air is often more polluted than outdoor air. It never hurts to freshen things up. You may even be able to simulate outdoor air flow with enough windows open.
- Take gratitude seriously
- Paying attention to what you’re grateful for or what you appreciate can quickly lift your mood, improve resilience, and improve your health.
Happy Thanksgiving!
